Dear 16 year old me...

This post was inspired by a status one of my friends/SAO sisters posted on Facebook. 

Dear 16-year-old me,

You're probably sitting in Coach Bettis's AP US History class with all of your friends. You got lucky with that class and have it with your best friends. You're embarrassed by your braces because you got them so late. You're the girl who had baby teeth until she was 15 and then had oral surgery. They had to pull an extra tooth, a permanent one, and now you have a gap in your teeth and you're mortified. You're worried about the SAT and where you'll go to college...but you have another year before you really have to start worrying about that. You're dancing 5 days a week at this point in time and super skinny, but you think you're fat. (Enjoy how thin you are- you won't ever be that small again!)

You're upset because you've never had a boyfriend or-gasp- never been kissed and it seems like the end of the world. Wait a year, and then you'll embark on a 2 and a half year journey with someone. He's the one you least expect. You will love him and he will love you back and you two will share wonderful times. He will teach you how to love someone who isn't a friend or family member. I won't tell you how it ends, because if I did you might not want to start that journey, but I promise you that you'll sit here almost a year after it does end and still do it all over again. Most importantly, you will have learned so much from that journey and the fall out, but we'll talk about that later. 

I'm going to give you some advice: stop being so judgmental. People make mistakes, and you'll make some of the same mistakes you're judging others for, just a few years later. Mistakes are how we learn and grow. And beauty will arise out of those mistakes. Open your heart to those people you feel like judging- you never know what lies under the surface. Don't judge sorority girls...you just might become one someday...

College. That looming cloud that hangs above your head. It will be one of the most stressful processes. You'll be scared. Right now you think you're probably going to go to a small liberal arts school. Oh honey, just wait until you see where you end up. I'll give you a hint- you'll learn to love red and black, and your love for it will surprise you.

Your sisters will start having babies soon, and those little ones will save your life. They'll provide you with so many giggles, hugs, challenges, and happiness. They will light up your life and bring you so much joy.

Listen to Mom. 95% of the time, she's right. When she tells you to bring an umbrella, do it. When she tells you to wear a jacket, do it. Don't snap at her so much, she's not "dumb," she's actually incredibly intelligent. You'll miss those 30 minute one-way trips to the dance studio when it was just the two of you. Even though she makes you want to roll your eyes, there will be days in college where all you want is your Mommy to hold you. She teaches you what it looks like to be a mother. Embody her selflessness because she is extraordinary.

Those two best friends you have who sit in that AP US class with you, they'll be there after high school, so don't worry. And you'll add one more to the mix. Invest in them, because they will get you through so much. You will see each other through family deaths, broken hearts, late nights, and some really tough stuff, but your friendship will never change.

Spend more time with Grandpa. He's a pretty awesome guy and you can learn so much from him. 

You're still sporting that fake smile. You forget about your problems from time to time, especially while you're dancing. You know how to laugh and giggle, but when you're alone the darkness creeps in. Someone will save you, a man actually. In fact, He died for you. His name is Jesus Christ. You believe in God, but you don't know Him. He will change your life, once you open your heart to Him. He's been intervening for a while, but now you'll know to call Him by name. He will guide you through college. He has a plan. He will allow you to go through some pretty horrible things. Walking with Him will not be easy. There will be tough days. You will flee from Him. You will still get lonely. You will reject Him as Peter did. There will be some pretty dark days, much darker than you can imagine. But He will place people in your life who will surprise you, and save you. You will learn to hear His voice. In fact, not only do you join a sorority, but a Christian sorority. At this point I know your jaw is on the floor, but fear not, He has overcome the world. You will learn how righteous He is. You'll even listen to and enjoy that "Jesus music." Be patient.

Life won't be easy. This is me writing at almost 21, and in 5 years more things will have happened than you can ever imagine, both good and bad. The skeletons in your closet will be revealed, but it'll be ok. Your love for writing won't ever change, so at least I can give you one constant in your life. Well, besides your family. Don't spend so much time in your room when they're home. Don't pick fights with your sisters, they will be your best friends. Mom, Courtney, Kristy, and Jackie, will always be the four most amazing and important women in your life.

Love more, complain less. Open your heart to the only One who will ever hold it. And listen to your mom

Smile, God loves you!